Hot Donna’s New Gig at Flopped the Nuts

Michael Heilemann.
If you have Dunstan's Time Since installed, this plugin uses it for the title="" attributes on the comments and posts. (For WordPress 1.5) Author: Brian Meidell Author URI: http://meidell.dk/blog Version 1.5: Now works without LOCK TABLE and CREATE TEMPORARY TABLE priviledges. Version 1.5.1: Can't remember what I did here Version 1.5.2: Fixed count select statement to not include spammy comments Version 1.5.3: Properly excludes track- and pingbacks Version 1.5.4: Excludes posts that are not published, even if they have comments Version 1.5.5: Fade old comments, fixed bug that wreaked havoc with Time Since Version 1.5.6: Bugfix from Jonas Rabbe (http://www.jonas.rabbe.com/) pertaining to timesince Version 1.5.7: Bugfix so old colors can be darker than new colors (stupid oversight), thanks to http://spiri.dk for spotting it. Bugfix where single digit hex would cause invalid colors, thanks to http://www.wereldkeuken.be/ for the fix. Version 1.5.8: Bugfix from Matthias Schutz regarding time_since. Version 1.5.9: Added function redefiniotion protection if people use the plugin in several places */ function blc_latest_comments($num_posts = 5, $num_comments = 6, $hide_pingbacks_and_trackbacks = true, $prefix = "

", $postfix = "

", $fade_old = true, $range_in_days = 10, $new_col = "#444444", $old_col = "#cccccc") { global $wpdb, $tablecomments, $tableposts; if(!function_exists('blc_clamp')) { function blc_clamp($min, $max, $val) { return max($min,min($max,$val)); } } function get_channel($col, $offset) { return hexdec(substr($col, $offset, 2)); } function channels($col) { $r = get_channel($col, 1); $g = get_channel($col, 3); $b = get_channel($col, 5); return array($r, $g, $b); } $max_time = $range_in_days * 24 * 60 * 60 ; function scale_channel($old, $new, $diff, $max_time) { $range = $old - $new; $c = round($diff/$max_time*($range))+$new; $c = blc_clamp(min($new, $old), max($new, $old), $c); $c_hex = str_pad(dechex($c), 2, '0', STR_PAD_LEFT); return $c_hex; } $usetimesince = function_exists('time_since'); // Work nicely with Dunstan's Time Since plugin (adapted by Michael Heilemann) // This is compensating for the lack of subqueries in mysql 3.x // The approach used in previous versions needed the user to // have database lock and create tmp table priviledges. // This uses more queries and manual DISTINCT code, but it works with just select privs. if(!$hide_pingbacks_and_trackbacks) $ping = ""; else $ping = "AND comment_type<>'pingback' AND comment_type<>'trackback'"; $posts = $wpdb->get_results("SELECT comment_post_ID, post_title FROM ($tablecomments LEFT JOIN $tableposts ON (comment_post_ID = ID)) WHERE comment_approved = '1' AND $tableposts.post_status='publish' $ping ORDER BY comment_date DESC;"); $seen = array(); $num = 0; if($fade_old) { list($r_new, $g_new, $b_new) = channels($new_col); list($r_old, $g_old, $b_old) = channels($old_col); } foreach($posts as $post) { // The following 5 lines is a manual DISTINCT and LIMIT, // since mysql 3.x doesn't allow you to control which way a DISTINCT // select merges multiple entries. if(array_key_exists($post->comment_post_ID, $seen)) continue; $seen[$post->comment_post_ID] = true; if($num++ > $num_posts) break; $commenters = $wpdb->get_results("SELECT *, UNIX_TIMESTAMP(comment_date) AS unixdate FROM $tablecomments WHERE comment_approved = '1' AND comment_post_ID = '".$post->comment_post_ID."' $ping ORDER BY comment_date DESC LIMIT $num_comments;"); $count = $wpdb->get_var("SELECT COUNT(comment_ID) AS c FROM $tablecomments WHERE comment_post_ID = $post->comment_post_ID AND comment_approved = '1' ".$ping); $i = 0; $link = get_permalink($post->comment_post_ID); if($usetimesince) $title = " title=\"Last comment was ".time_since($commenters[0]->unixdate)." ago\""; else $title = ""; echo $prefix."".stripslashes($post->post_title). " ".$count."
\n"; foreach($commenters as $commenter) { if($usetimesince) $title = " title=\"Posted ".time_since($commenter->unixdate)." ago\""; if($fade_old) { $diff = time() - $commenter->unixdate; $r_hex = scale_channel($r_old, $r_new, $diff, $max_time); $g_hex = scale_channel($g_old, $g_new, $diff, $max_time); $b_hex = scale_channel($b_old, $b_new, $diff, $max_time); $colstr = " style=\"color: #".$r_hex.$g_hex.$b_hex.";\""; } if($i++ > 0) echo ", "; echo "comment_ID."\"$title>".stripslashes($commenter->comment_author).""; } if($count > $num_comments) echo " [...]"; echo "".$postfix."\n"; } } ?> Hot Donna’s New Gig at Flopped the Nuts

Hot Donna’s New Gig

Published by Textbook 3 years, 6 months ago in Home Games, On the Tube, Celebrities

Caught this on the TiVo and watched it yesterday: E! Hollywood Hold ‘Em

This ain’t your average star-studded poker show, people, so pay attention. In E! Hollywood Hold ‘Em, one of Hollywood’s finest opens his or her home to two celebrity friends, two not-so-famous buddies–and you! They’re playing for $10,000 in real cash, and they don’t stop until somebody’s got it all. You in?

The show is “created by” Laura Prepon (”Hot” Donna on That 70s Show), and she also serves as executive producer along with about a dozen other folks. In the first episode, Laura hosts her boyfriend Chris Masterson, Danny Masterson, who is Laura’s costar and Chris’ brother, one half-famous buddy (I’ve seen the guy before…), and one totally non-famous friend. It makes for an interesting dynamic: “Oh, if Chris or Danny win, they’ll just give half of the $10-grand to the Church of Scientology. If the other guy wins, he can buy groceries. Fun!”

The game is dealt by Phil “The Unabomber” Laak, who seems to have a knack for shuffling the deck just perfectly so that the hand you just folded will prove to be the winner if you ask him to rabbit hunt.

The best part about the show, much like WPT Hollywood Home Game or Celebrity Poker Showdown, is definitely not the poker. This one, more than the others, though, really feels like a home game. The players don’t stay focused, Laak ends up in my usual role of trying to keep the game moving, and the biggest difference: There’s no in-game hand commentary. They have hole-cams so you see the hands, and they cut in post-game interviews with the player saying “Well, I had King-Queen suited, so I figured I should stick around…” and so forth, but Laak is basically in the game, so no one is announcing “Laura has a 5-9 off-suit and for some reason has decided to call.”

Recommended as mindless entertainment.

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